middle of the night anxiety ...

good remedies for middle of the night anxiety. play AnxietyEase, put on sandals and take a walk. anxious that i will run out of things to do. if you take a walk you'll never run out of things to do. starting to feel horny @ 12:16am not good. Bing now. good.

REAL worry about my LIFE ...

i'm starting to really worry about what i'm doing now. felt really sad when i saw the Downtown Toyota ad in the newspaper i'm using for my pants. those people there were really nice to me all the time.
is it just winter and there are so few people around here? i feel real PANIC in the afternoons. maybe use your AnxietyEase when you start to feel like that. OR get out and see some people on my favorite walk - use BOTH. take walk, come back and if still feel anxious listen to CD (on computer now since my CD's haven't arrived yet or my Union Suit)
is bloody Canada Post just at a snail's pace?. surely my Union suit will not come by Canada Post - why is it taking so long? look into it. taking long time or am i just impatient? the fact is that this time is a real PERIOD of adjustment. take ONE DAY AT A TIME and decide how to handle it as it comes. David moving out and taking retirement almost simultaneously is a real reason to feel this way. so try and understand that you're feeling the way you need to feel. go and see someone?

Iron Age ME ...

Julia @ the British Museum answered ME, whoopee!

i got a wonderful answer to my BM post. now i am in contact with the people i WANT to be in contact with. i will follow-up on all of Julia's suggestions. my response was perfect. "i live in Canada ..."

sleep worry

here i am again worrying about my bloody SLEEP. it's hard to get used to the new pattern of 1st and 2nd sleeps. realistically it's working very well. i have my 1st sleep for about 3 hours, get up and am very productive. then i have my 2nd sleep for about 4 hours. seems to be a well developed pattern. SO WHY AM I WORRIED all the time about it? you are just so used to worry, i guess. many things have changed but that one will have to wait for change. in the mean time, try to not get in such a flap about it.

do ancestry with Linda's geneology

i decided to forget ancestry.com - costs money. got a message from About archaeology but it sure wasn't personal. 11th century is not 700bc to 0ad. that was a waste of time. read about sites and see video again and make your wool jacket. starting to feel bad again. went to bed and slept for 3 hours but seemed to be too short. fear that my sleep thing is not working. also had another frightful day at Richmond Centre. i think i was just TOO HOT. need to try and wear shoes when taking the bus and waiting around for things in the cold, damp air. got a slight cough from going from super hot mall into cold, damp outside. was JUST FINE on my afternoon walk with sandals, socks, big sweatshirt and regular plaid pants. starting into my fear thing again. fear of the fear. trying to get all involved in some new project seems to lead to disappointment. so try to take one project at a time. finish it. then move onto another project. LOOKING FORWARD TO SPRING! everyone out and walking dogs, a lot of people are around and i hope to feel good (not perfect) by then. hope to solve my weird feeling in malls. test out being TOO HOT.

Precious David and Leah ...

took me out to coffee today. How great to see them and share some time with them.

brand new interest - IRON AGE BRITAIN

i'm really looking forward to finding out about Iron Age Festivals and seeing if there have any support here. then i'll go to one. GOODIE. heard from Linda - we certainly have out differences but she is my only family apart from David so i WANT to keep in regular touch during this rather difficult transition time from working to not-working. i'm off cloud nine and in reality, so i need all the "company" i can get. didn't hear from libby today, that's good.
i signed up for an Archaeology newsletter from About.com. Probably useless, but BBC hasn't produced anything. FIND A REAL FORUM or Message board for Archaeology. Good luck.

i'm SAD about Ted ...

i haven't heard form him for 2 weeks now. have i truly ruined our friendship this time? or is he just busy? i don't think it's wise to email or contact him via his website, so i'll just be patient until Christmas and then send him a message on his tomorrow's garden site.

learn HOW TO BE A FRIEND ...

i don't know how to be a friend. Libby seems to wan to be friends, so i'll try to reach out to her as she has reached out to me. she makes me annoyed at her know-it-all attitude but no one's perfect.
i'm sad about Ted but my friendship with Libby seems to be progressing. it's lonely here now as everyone is gone. i can't wait until Spring when hopefully more people will be out and about.

OCEAN & Pulses ...

this Whole Night seems to work better than just the pulses. i think i did the 1st and 2nd sleep thing last night. it will be interesting to see if i still need a NAP around 3pm
went back to my old just pulses CD. started to get a real reaction to the Ocean + Pulses CD one time i woke up.

AnxietyEase

WOW! does that work! i lay down on my little bed for 1/2 hr and all the stuff (i was starting to worry about just watching TV all day and now i feel like going to Rona and going to Sav-on Foods + Whole Foods tomorrow. GOOD! thank you Yan